What's in a Name?

This post is like the comic relief breather in a Cirque du Soleil show after a couple of intense acts.

I thought I might explain where I came up with my blog site name; Wildwood Diva. I named my property Wildwood a few years back, because it is really wild, 20 acres situated next to 100,000 acres of forest and I've had some unbelievable experiences here. Then, I became the Wildwood Diva, well, by default. Actually, I think I have earned it with all the experiences I have had here, whether self-created (more on that in a moment) or simply the fact of being here. A few of you know some of my crazy stories....running in the dark with a flashlight, after a large Black Bear that scampered up a tree (turns out he didn't go up the tree but was in the woods). Good thing I have a strong heart and low blood pressure because it didn't stay low. There's more on that story, just ask me sometime if you want the details. How about, accidentally starting my forest on fire and then frantically having to put it out alone....Terrifying! Don't try that at home, unless you want to lose about 10 pounds in sweat, literally sweating through leather gloves, burn your face and test your heart function. Again, you can ask me for details. Going out to warm up my truck last winter when we had all that ice and snow, walking away, and then turning around to see my truck sliding off my driveway, over a garden, down the hill, and crashing into a tree. I think the driveway was all ice and slamming the door caused a rocking motion that set my truck sliding. Good thing I didn't see it until it is was already rolling down the hill, or knowing me I would have tried to stop it. I know, I'm crazy. I could keep going and going, but I'll stop at one more. How about crawling on my knees, sliding on my butt, picking my way through a frozen ditch in heels and in the dark, because the last mile to my house was covered in ice. An ice storm had hit while I was in Seattle and I couldn't drive up the hills to my house. It took me 45 minutes to slip and slide my way home. Do you think I stopped at one of my neighbors to ask for help? Of course not. Seriously, that thought didn't even occur to me. It would have been too easy!

Ok, so maybe those stories don't qualify me for the Diva part of the name, but I think these experiences do.

Trading stares, for what seemed like forever, with a Mountain Lion in the morning, 30 ft from my house. He was gorgeous, and unlike me, was not afraid. He turned and trotted away. Rescuing hummingbirds trapped in my garage, by picking them up in my hands. They don't fight. They sit calmly in my cupped hands, until I remove the top hand and they fly away. So tiny, yet so trusting. I have so many more experiences along these lines, in fact, one happened the other night. Dan and I went to walk the dogs late in the evening. I heard an owl and we followed its call toward a corner of my property. I recognized the call. It was a Spotted Owl. Yes, that's right, a Spotted Owl. We could hear him hooting loudly in the tree. The dogs waited while we listened. I wanted to go back to the house to get a recording device. We walked about 50 yards back towards the house, when we heard him in a tree right beside us. He had followed us there. We listened some more. I couldn't believe it, getting followed by a rare Spotted Owl. I figured we wouldn't have time to grab a recorder and come back before he took off, so we shined the flashlight on him to get a good look. He didn't appreciate that and took off in full view of the flashlight beam. What a beautiful bird.

Experiences such as the Spotted Owl visit or holding a Hummingbird make me realize how amazing and full of wonder life is. There is so much of it around us and outside of ourselves, if we only slow down to appreciate it.

Recovering and Recharging

My initial date to start chemotherapy has come and gone. So, has the second postponed date. In the meantime, I have been quite sick dealing with a viral respiratory infection. Dan and I picked it up on the way home from Las Vegas. We had the same symptoms, but his were 1/10th that of mine. He's well and I'm still on the mend. This infection has been so bad, that I've felt like chemotherapy has already started....extreme fatigue, loss of appetite, nausea, vomiting, in addition to the standard flu symptoms of aches, chills, sore throat, coughing, laryngitis. I've had alot of pajama days (didn't even bother getting out of my pj's cause I was in bed sleeping so much). I told my doctor that after going through this, chemo is going to seem easy!

Chemotherapy has now been postponed until January 7. You think, "Oh what a luxury, she can pick when she starts." Well, actually if I started when I have an infection like this or any other infection, chemo could send me quickly over the cliff into Never Ever Land. Also, I need to rebuild my reserves which have been depleted by this infection. Thus, I'll take the "luxury" of postponing chemo.

It's Started

My next marathon has begun.

I had a port, central line, catheter, all the same thing, put in my chest on Wednesday. Had I known the full details of the surgical procedure, I may have chickened-out. A 1 ½ inch incision was cut in the right side of my chest and a siliconized rubber disk was put under the skin. Then the IV line attached to the port was threaded under my skin up over my collarbone and down through another 1 inch incision made above my collarbone. The second incision was used to start an IV in my neck and then the tubing from the port line was threaded through the vein all the way down until just outside my heart. Yes, there was a lot of pain afterwards and I even woke up during the procedure when he was cutting into/putting the IV in my neck and I said “That hurts!” They really knocked me out after that. Unfortunately, I got very sick from the anesthesia drugs they gave me. And to top it off, I have picked up a cold. So, my battery has been running pretty low the last few days. I’m glad I have a comfortable bed. That all said, once I’ve recovered, the good news is that I have been giving the green light to do any kind of exercise. Running trails here I come.

Assuming I get rid of my cold, I start chemotherapy on Wednesday, Dec. 12. The first cycle will be for 4 days in a row, outpatient. The following cycles will be every 4 weeks for a total of 6 months. I really don’t know what to expect, other than a lot of fatigue. I suspect I will be getting plenty of sleep.

I have family or friends staying with me for the treatment weeks, but will be on my own the rest of the time. Many of you have asked if there is something you can do. For starters, I think I’d like to put a list together of who is willing to do what and your contact info. I realize everyone is busy and this way if there is a list, someone in that Helping Hand section will be able to respond when needed.

So, here are a few things.
1) Frozen meals serving 2-3 people.
2) Taking me to doctor appointments
3) Running errands like picking up prescriptions or getting basic food supplies
4) Helping me with a few household chores like laundry
5) GUYS---Filling up my wood supply and playing with the dogs

I’m sure there are some more items that will get added to the list, as time progresses.

Thanks for being there, sending prayers, positive thoughts, and love. It really does help. Oh yeah, and the funny emails. Guys, you know who you are.

Kit